The Greatest Thing in the World

Let love be your highest goal! (I Cor. 14:1 NLT).

In the Western world, Plato (427-347 BC) has had perhaps the dominant influence on how the word “love” is understood. His book The Symposium is regarded by many as the foundational text on love. It describes a dinner party attended by Socrates and his friends. The guests are invited to give speeches in praise of love (Greek, eros). As the wine flows freely, the speakers rise, one after another, to describe love’s beauty and explain its meaning.

The evening culminates as Socrates and his drunken friends agree that the highest form of eros possible is homosexual love. If anyone is seeking a philosophical explanation for the moral confusion present in our world today, Plato’s Symposium should perhaps be considered Exhibit A! 

Though the Greeks could sometimes use the word eros to describe noble dimensions of altruistic behavior, the word generally was used in reference to feelings of pleasure experienced when one’s desires were satisfied. The love for chocolate easily falls into this category. Eros typically refers to forms of affection that are self-seeking, self-gratifying, and sensual. Basically, the word means “desire” and is often used of romantic, sexual love. This definition orients one’s understanding of love to the realm of personal happiness. To say, “I love you,” tends to mean little more than “I love the way I feel when I am with you.” Love comes to be equated with that-which-makes-me-happy. To put the matter bluntly, eros is typically a camouflaged form of self-love. “I love you” turns out to mean “I love me.”

Though the term eros was the primary word for human affection in the Greek-speaking world of the first century, the word does not appear in the New Testament – not even once! The inspired writers knew that a different word was needed to convey the reality of what God had done in sending his Son into the world to give his life as a sacrifice for sin. They occasionally used the word storge and more often the word philia primarily to describe human affection among family members and friends. But the writers of the New Testament settled on the term agape as their preferred word for “love.” Used over two hundred times, it describes a new kind of love that was virtually unknown until Jesus showed us what it was and how it worked. 

Agape describes a love that is based on the character of the lover more than on the merits of the one who is loved. It is not self-seeking or directed toward personal happiness. Rather, it is completely devoted to the well-being of the other person. Although there are hints of agape in the world around us (a mother’s love for her baby, for example), this form of love is a uniquely Christian idea.

When Jesus set forth the supreme ethic of the Christian faith, he insisted that love for God and love for one’s neighbor is what God is primarily looking for (see Matt. 22:34-40). In fact, Jesus said that agape-love would be the single distinguishing mark of his followers: “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (Jn. 13:35). Yes, when it comes to the gospel of Jesus Christ, agape is the summum bonum (Latin, the ultimate good). 

It is when agape is contrasted to eros that we discover the revolutionary implications of the gospel. In a world saturated with egocentrism, sensuality, romance, and the pursuit of personal happiness, the proclamation and the practice of agape feels like a nuclear explosion! In his classic work Agape and Eros (1932), Anders Nygren writes: “…the pagan world was thoroughly impregnated with the idea of Eros. The meeting of Agape and Eros was Christianity’s hour of destiny…”  (p. 23).

At the risk of oversimplifying a subject that scholars have studied and debated for centuries, we might contrast these two foundational understandings of love in the following manner:  

      Eros           Agape

Self-seeking, self-gratifying	Self-giving
Based on emotions, feelings	Based on the will
Avoids pain	Embraces pain
Clutches and controls	Releases and lets go
Must be earned, merited	Is freely given
Is determined by the worth of the loved one	Is determined by the character of the lover
What’s in it for me?	What’s in it for you?
Ego-centric	Other-oriented

Although the practice of agape certainly includes emotions, it would be misleading to call it a feeling. Feelings happen to us. Not so with agape. We may fall in love, but no one falls in agape! Agape is a choice. It is an engagement of the will. Agape is a whole-hearted commitment of focused good-will that is directed toward someone else. To love with this kind of passion is costly and the risk of being hurt is great. There is no greater expression of agape than the cross of Christ. “But God shows his agape for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Rom. 5:8).

Yes, agape-love is the greatest thing in the world. And I Corinthians 13 is the greatest piece of literature ever written about the greatest thing in the world. Verses 4-7 are the closest thing we have in the Bible to an actual definition of agape.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (I Cor. 13:4-7 NLT)

Whether conscious of it or not, in describing agape, Paul is describing the character of Jesus. In fact, one could substitute his name everywhere the noun “love” is used. Jesus is patient and kind. Jesus is not jealous or boastful or proud … etc. 

Now, could I ask you, dear reader, to do something courageous? Read these verses once more, slowly, and put your name in place of the word “love.” Then, listen to what the Holy Spirit says to your heart. If you are like me, you will need to find a quiet place to repent and ask for divine assistance in making agape-love your highest goal! 

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1 This article is a lightly edited abridgement of chapter 5 in my book Cross Purposes (Francis Asbury Press, 2023.pp. 127-149).